Understanding Why: On The Issue of Being Gay

Our nation is currently voicing its opinion on gay marriage.  My state of North Dakota is also voicing its opinion on the right to life or abortion, as a bill was recently introduced concerning the matter.   I have made some comments about both these issues but I want to specifically go deeper into why I believe the way I do on the gay issue.  I hope to show you that there is actually substance to my opinion and not some off the wall emotional response.  I actually want what’s best for people and that often entails looking at the things that others do not take into consideration.  Our choices have consequences.

I want to make this clear from the beginning.  I personally am not sure that governments should be making the decisions it is being asked to make.  I also do not think I am opposed to the idea of gay marriages being recognized by our nation or by a state.  I personally believe marriage is much more than what a government says or does not say it is.  People have the choice to be gay no matter what definition is given to “marriage.”  Having said that, I will more than likely always vote against gay marriage for reasons I will shortly get into.

My second disclaimer before we get into the goods is this.  I love gay people.  I do not treat them differently from anyone else.  In fact, I rarely ever know if someone is gay unless they tell me.  I value all humans with the value that God does.  He loves everyone regardless of their sexual orientation.  So just because I do not agree with their choices does not mean that I dislike them as a person and it especially does not mean that I hate them.

Natural Order

You must understand that I am a naturalist.  By this I mean that God has created us and nature with a specific purpose.  When the natural order of that purpose is removed from its natural state, dysfunction occurs.  I openly admit that I am not perfect in this, (like when I eat unnatural food) but it is my heart’s desire and I continue to grow in this way of life.   A great example of this is the food we eat.  I love eating natural foods.  I have come to understand what happens when people eat unnatural foods.  It is not good for their body, their mind and their overall health.  When man introduces unnatural ways to grow food, the food and the earth become contaminated and dysfunctional.  This is why I support organic and sustainable methods that bring health and harmony to life’s natural process.

When it comes to sexual orientation, I believe nature teaches us what the proper function is.  The organic nature of a man and a woman having the sexual parts necessary to create life is clearly seen.  The puzzle pieces fit perfectly and only a dysfunctional understanding of this would lead to value life in an unnatural way.  The majority of the world has always lived in the understanding of men and women being the only way a true “marriage” can happen.  Nature shows us the proper relationship of men and women.  It is an organic way of life.

Like nature, when unnatural things are introduced to our relationships, you can get the appearance of natural order ( like food) but you actually have a substance that is not healthy for the body.  What people often fail to realize is the cycle of dysfunction that is created by unnatural choices.  There are unhealthy things happening on multiple levels that the surface rarely addresses.  The natural process of healthy relationships far outweighs the supposed benefits to keeping something unnatural together.  Appearances are deceiving until you realize how something was made.

Unnatural Ideas

Being gay is an idea.  It is also a learned behavior.  We can understand this from nature.  It really is impossible for someone to be born gay.  Two gay people do not have the ability to create life.  As nature teaches us, like begets like.  Without the ability to create life in its whole form, something becomes unnatural and dysfunctional.  From that foundation one has to work at trying to make things look good to justify the broken foundation upon which it is built.  When unnatural ideas are grown they become the substitutes for the real thing.  Being gay does not come from nature.  I have compassion on people who miss the real thing.

Pain and Wounds

Gay people often freely admit their emotional wounds.  Many of these stem from family and cultural issues.  These wounds grow in the unnatural soils of bitterness, fear and rejection.  When unhealthy emotions are rooted in this soil, the healthy emotion of wanting to be loved and accepted gets distorted.  It is like a genetically modified seed that grows outside of the way nature intended.  While there may be benefits to a gay relationship, wholeness can never be realized because unnatural ingredients are always present in the foundation.

Take the above with the experience of people who were once gay but have changed their lifestyle and are now free from what they considered to be a lie.  They openly admit the very real dysfunctions that accompany gay lifestyles.  While, everyone has issues to deal with, gay people have to deal with their choice to live differently and often times loudly against the way nature has designed them.  This produces tons of unhealthy stress.

Gay people are fighting the natural desire to be loved and accepted in who they were meant to be with the idea of who they think they are supposed to be.  Mix this with every human’s right to freedom and you get a whole batch of healthy and unhealthy ingredients.  These people are hurting and that is why so many oppose gay lifestyles because they know the harmful effects that accompany it.  I want people to become whole and to stop hurting.  The natural process of healing can lead the way but that is for another time.


Children are one of the main reasons I do not agree with a gay marriage.  Children, by nature, were designed to have a loving mother and a father.  It is the natural and healthiest way for a child to be raised.  Our society is already reaping the destructive choices of children who are fatherless.  It is unnatural for a child to be raised without a father and mother.  This raises concerns for us who value children.  When people want what is best for children they want them to have what is natural to the way they were designed to be supported.  Children were designed to live in a healthy family with a mother and father.  When society replaces this, they reap the dysfunctional fruit of an unnatural process.

Children are supposed to be the fruit produced from the seed of love.  To reject them is to reject love in many regards (not all).  They are to be the fruit of a natural process built on the foundation of love and protected by the two people that created them.

My Experience

From experience I highly recommend marriage between a man and a woman.  My wife and I have found that the natural order of life works best regarding this and other things like the food we eat and the thoughts we think.  We have an extremely amazing son as a result of our commitment to each other.  He was naturally produced through our love and the natural order of life.  As you see, being organic and natural is much more than the food we eat, it is the choices we make corresponding to how we were designed to function.  Unnatural functions breed dysfunctional and unnatural results emotionally, physically and spiritually.  I want people whole on every level, as nature intended.

In Closing

I recently saw something on Facebook that grabbed my attention.  Many people are using the = sign as their approval of equality on the gay marriage issue, yet someone said the following,

“The equals sign.  Two exactly distinguishable bars with the same orientation that are forever standing apart.”

I believe this is true.  Two gay people may have the benefits of friendship together but they will forever be standing apart because they do not have the natural ability to live as nature intended.  They will forever butt heads trying to make sense of the passion they feel for each other but wondering why they can never be completed.  They may say they are complete but they know they are not.  Wholeness is the answer.  True love that values the way we were designed and finally comes to believe in the value of wholeness will completely satisfy them.  Why settle for less when you can have more?

I believe life is best lived in the organic soils of love.  These lives produce the healthiest fruit.  This is why marriages between committed men and women fit perfectly, as nature intended.  Being gay is simply unnatural.  It is not the best for a person.  When I disagree with gay lifestyles I do it because I want what is best for the world.  But it takes enlightened eyes to see the ramifications of every choice.  Remember, looking out for people’s best interest will not always mean they think you are doing so.  Keep doing so.  It is natural.


Two articles concerning a gay man and his opposition to gay marriage are provided below.  He raises some of the same points I addressed and also a key point of how government may continue to take away our freedoms by thinking we are fighting for them.




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